Wow I keep putting off blogging (TW cal intake and weight + talk about suicidal stuff)

And I don't know why I do it. Sorry. I'm just a master at procrastination.

I'm blogging from Edinburgh now!! I got a 38 in my IB score which was okay and I got into  the Linguistics course here :)

Ed is lovely, the people are v nice even though the weather isn't. I've put on a bit over the summer :( and now I weigh 126.3lbs. Mum got me a fancy scale too with body fat calculations and all but I haven't tried out the new functions.

I have to reach 115 by 22/12 or I'm not allowed to come back, mother's rules, she's quite pissed that I gained back everything I lost over the summer.

And the food here is amazing so my calorie intake has skyrocketed :/
Bread (204), cream cheese (100), smoked salmon (200), ice cream (194), goji (36), jelly (5), ribena (20), bratwurst (350), more cream cheese sandwiches (152), ice cream (627) = 1888

But I'm trying to eat healthier hopefully. Or just less calorie-wise bc I wanna reach 105 by christmas. I'm making a meal plan and stuff. Maybe do another MPA challenge I haven't been there for a bit.
I've also been clean since the end of February which I'm v happy about although I'm still v tempted to relapse :/

One of my friends who's a recovering anorexic wanted to bet with me, which of us would lose weight down to 88lbs first. I turned her down and I'm also immensely worried about her. She's resitting the exams and she has suicidal tendencies and I'm trying to talk to her as much as possible already.

Depression wise I think I'm doing a bit better than I was in high school? But I miss high school tons. I still have bad days (duh) but there are less of them so that's a good thing :)

I'm praying the semester isn't too stressful!!

Hope everyone is doing good <3 I'm v sleepy and my dorm is a mess. lol. I'll post some pictures in a bit.

If anyone wants to message me my fb is Christabel Rose. Otherwise I'll comment when I can <3 (I'm not making any more promises we all know how that turns out)